Ideas to leave on the shelf

Okay, I thought I’d provide some relief from all the posts on AI, influencers, or the demise of third-party cookies. I’d like to talk, briefly, about LOUSY commercials. Or more specifically, tired, hackneyed scenarios masquerading as concepts that still find their way into today’s traditional media like TV and radio. And for some pretty big-name advertisers.

Let’s start with a basic premise: if your product or sale is so great, you don’t need to create fake urgency or a silly alternate universe where consumers everywhere are overwhelmed by it and respond instantly. Somewhere, a new copywriter must have been convinced that THEIR interpretation of this cobweb-covered fossil was funny enough to break the mold (or knock the mold off).

The “drop everything and run” cliche.

At the moment, Domino’s is barreling down this well-worn path. The announcer mentions a 50% off promotion “right now” That leads to several astonished people excitedly repeating the “right now” and stopping what they’re doing to head for Dominos. (I guess the company temporarily suspended its obsession with delivery for this campaign.)

The gobsmacked consumers include a lady washing her car and the mandatory news anchor who tosses her scripts in the air and rushes off set to get the deal. Then, of course – and get ready for the knee slapper – a guy fresh from the shower clad only in a towel races off to get in on this life-changing pizza discount. Wow, get ready, Cannes.

The approach is not new, of course, that’s the point. The same principle applies to many an automotive brand, including higher-end nameplates. The vehicles roll through town, attracting open-mouthed stares and admiration, and often a flock of groupies chasing it to get a better look. Oh, please.

The “stunned actors” schtick.

This one is currently being abused in radio spots for a cell service provider. The old “talent at the mic” dialogue with the studio engineer. She’s supposed to read the script, but the offer is SO good, she questions the engineer about it. (He delivers the only decent moment in the spot with a snide “that’s what it says.”)

She, of course, is out the door without completing the spot. Heh heh, I can’t stop laughing.

Others deserving retirement.

In an earlier edition of his classic book “Hey, Whipple, Squeeze This” Luke Sullivan had a section of commercial ideas/situations that have become tired parodies of themselves. I love his list, which includes spots that feature manufactured “game shows.” True confessions, I did one of those early in my career, but honest, mine was great.) Another moldy oldie is the faked “breaking news” item complete with interruptive sound effects.

I would personally add those forced structures developed to allow the writer to cram in every possible product feature to please the client. Obviously, there was no adult in the room to apply the critical discipline to decide which one was most important. Let’s call it the laundry list approach.

“What makes XXXXXXXX carpet cleaning service the best? Is it our unique cleaning chemicals? Or our prompt reliable service? Or our state-of-the-art X400 Steam Cleaning Machine? Well, it just MIGHT be our low, low prices.”

Sometimes these are presented as two “consumers” allegedly discussing the brand, or employees trying to write the company jingle, etc. Either way, it has the unique ability to make consumers glaze over and a sample reel instantly invisible. The strategy (or lack of a real one) is just so darned transparent.

Oh well, aspiring copywriters (or those who should know better) should try to avoid these creative potholes. I’d share more, but WOW, I just heard there’s a big sale on RIGHT NOW at

The Social Media Sewer – My Favorite Twitter Follow

We “know” so much more about social media now, with analytics coming out the WhatsApp. And we can provide a pretty good justification to clients who still question the relationship of “likes” or “follows” to their ROI in maintaining a meaningful presence.

And, of course, we know all about the companies that seem to be nailing it, at least in terms of providing valued content (think Dove, Chipotle, Gymshark) or cheeky interactions fans enjoy (Wendys, Skittles, Netflix, also Oreos). And TikTok, of course, is dancing to center stage. But…I’ve found a new favorite.

Not following @neorsd on Twitter? What a waste!

As a Cleveland native, I’m still a fan of the city and its sports teams (though it’s a challenge to remain a Browns fan right now). Go, Guardians! But in following a few Cleveland accounts on Twitter, I came across continuously interesting content from — of all things — the Northeast Ohio Regional Sewer District.

The content it provides ranges from goofy and quirky to serious discussions of infrastructure and system improvements. And it occasionally drifts into “Stuart Smalley” territory with heartfelt words and poems about how to approach your daily life.

On the “quirky” side, the person running the account walks a wonderful line of reverent irreverence in responding to comments.

Just don’t make the mistake of encouraging people to actually flush allegedly “flushable” wipes. You just might inspire a song!

old: sea shanties
bold: sewer shanties pic.twitter.com/YfYUy5cvkg

— NE Ohio Regional Sewer District (@neorsd) January 14, 2021

What Good Does It Do?

Some cynics, of course, might ask what the utility hopes to gain by maintaining this presence? I think that’s an easy answer.

To most people, utilities are at best invisible. At worst, they either cost too much (directly, or indirectly in taxes) or are simply thought of as part of “government.” Which doesn’t call up warm, fuzzy feelings in the last few decades.

In my view, the account breeds plenty of goodwill with its northeast Ohio constituents while providing plenty of useful information. And it subtly reinforces that there are plenty of good people focused on doing the work that helps a community function. (And work that not many would yearn to do.)

Go with the Flow

Okay, had to get ONE sewer pun in this somewhere. But the account recently passed 32k followers, which is pretty impressive for a water treatment utility. So why not check it out? Again, it’s @neorsd on Twitter. Worst case, you waste a few minutes. Even then, they’ll probably get those minutes back to you, safely treated and ready for re-use.

Progressive’s Dr. Rick spots: masterful copywriting and casting.

Okay, yesterday I was a little crabby, complaining about a current campaign. So today, I thought I’d make amends by praising one I have long admired.

Soon, I want to do a post on the current phenomenon of insurance companies running multiple, and different, campaigns at the same time. But today, I have an appointment with Dr. Rick

Strategy is obvious…but wonderfully so.

Clearly, companies like Progressive need to break the stranglehold traditional companies have on young adults as they go out on their own. Research shows that most of them simply choose the company their parents relied upon. (Heck, they usually started out on their parents’ policies.)

Since most kids want to do anything but what their parents did, those seem like easy dots to connect. And no one does that as effectively as Dr. Rick. And the best part? No subterfuge is necessary

Ahh, those goofy parents.

The campaign, as you well know, involves Dr. Rick in a constant struggle to help folks not repeat the quirky little habits and obsessions their parents displayed. Now, the people in the spots don’t seem especially young, but that’s a good call – because viewers roughly 18-28 can see them as their parents.

I don’t think you can watch these spots without identifying favorite characters and favorite quirks that resonate from your own experience. You’ll find the nice-but-slightly-too-controlling mom and the analytical guy who can’t resist figuring out the business model behind any enterprise. There are even dad jokes tossed in.

Joy in the details.

Obviously, I enjoy the casting and performances. “Dr. Rick” handles his role with a perfect blend of patience and quiet exasperation. And the “students” are all terrific. The quirks flow so freely and naturally, you know those people.

They are painted as lovable losers – approximately how Progressive would like its target audience to see them. “They’re nice, they’re fun – but I’m certainly not going to be like that.”

Is it anything like Flo? Nope. Does it work well with a kid spinning a “Progressive” sign on the street corner? Uh….no. But as a stand-alone campaign designed to make a specific point with its audience (and in the process, entertain the people it’s trying to make fun of)? I think it works very well.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go wash the dishes before putting them into the dishwasher.